1 You go to the inter-collegiate festival at ST. Theresa’s WOMEN'S College to participate in an event and the guard near the gate lets you enter the campus only after you show your invitation and if he is satisfied, he frisks you as if you have some hidden equipment on you.
2 You walk with your mom on the side walks of marine drive, and expect at least a dozen gals of your neighbourhood enjoying the breeze mysteriously disappearing.
3 To get your work done in the Corporation Office on a busy day, you'd have to use the path beneath the desk or come in and shout in a hybrid of English and Hindi.
4 You don’t stop at the red signals if you got 100 rupees to spare and a non sensitive ear to listen to the police constable blabber about his honesty and his helping you by accepting the gift.
5 Every fifth person you meet claims that he or she is a MODEL or a DISC JOCKEY. In truth there are just two discs in Cochin and they get guys from Bangalore or Bombay to perform the gigs.
6 Every kid in your locality knows the political scenario of the state without even listening to the evening news and he will readily give his opinion about the smart city project.
7 All the cheap, college going studs wait near the ST. Theresa for, err, recreation. On a typical evening there might be more guys than gals near the college.
8 When you invite your friend over to your place to spend the weekend (with no parents around to interfere), be prepared to do salvage on your relation with your neighbour’s daughter.
9 Never sit by the side of an unknown woman in the public transports even if the seat by her side is vacant and she is twice your mom’s age. She will ask you to move away or act like you have an infectious disease.
10 Gal friends are possessions costlier than diamonds and a lot depends on your visa card.
(I am offering a Rs. 500 reward to the first person who shows me a city in India with better back waters and lagoons than Cochin has.)